ROCK N' ROLL TROLLS

(A One Act Play)

BY

KIM FIRMSTON

(copyright Kim Firmston 2005)

When the Fairy Queen is kidnapped by the Rock N' Roll Trolls it's up to a group of Girl Guides who are strong and smart and brave to rescue her. On their travels past crocodiles, mud monsters and a two headed creature named Bob, they hear nothing but bad things about the trolls. But are the trolls really so bad or do they just need to learn some manners? And can the Fairy Queen learn to accept people who are different than herself? The Guides think they know the answers.

CHARACTERS

* please note, this play was written for the 35th Calgary Girl Guides. Names and sexes and the name of the group can be changed to suit your needs.

Fairy Queen – a beautiful dancer
Ella – a Girl Guide
Lateefa – a Girl Guide
Sarah – a Girl Guide
Judy – a Girl Guide Leader
Anne – A Girl Guide Leader
Bunny 1 – a cute talking bunny
Bunny 2 – a bad tempered talking bunny
Mud Monster – a riddle talking creature
Croc 1: a crocodile
Croc 2: a crocodile
Croc 3: a crocodile
Bob Head 1: Bob
Bob Head 2: Toshi-tanjiro-morio-kyoko
King Rotten: guitarist of the Rock and Roll Trolls
Crash: the bassist for the Rock and Roll Trolls
Doom: the key board player for the Rock and Roll Trolls
Lux: the drummer for the Rock and Roll Troll

 

ROCK N' ROLL TROLLS

SCENE ONE

 

A clearing in the woods.

SOUND: The Fairy Queen music starts

The Fairy Queen enters stage left and starts a beautiful dance, waving her wand in the air.  Bunny 1 and Bunny 2 start to dance with her. 

SOUND: Suddenly the Troll King’s music blares.

The Troll King runs on the stage (Stage Left) and grabs the Fairy Queen.  The Fairy Queen drops her wand and the Bunnies flee Center Stage.  The Troll King runs off Stage Right with the Fairy Queen.

 

ROCK N' ROLL TROLLS 

SCENE TWO

 

Same clearing in the woods.

Girl Guides (or name of your youth group or school) enter stage left singing a campfire song.

ELLA: Wow this forest is beautiful!

LATEEFA:  It sure is Ella.

JUDY: Here’s a good clearing.  How about we set up our tents right here?

ALL: sounds of agreement

The girls lay down their packs while the leaders look off into the distance at a mountain peak.

SARAH: Look you guys, what’s that over there?  Is that a twinkling light? (She points towards the wand)

All the Girls run to the wand and make a little circle around it.  The leaders look on from a distance.

ANNE: It’s probably just a little ant or something, right Judy?

JUDY: Isn’t it always?
 
The leaders shriek with laughter

JUDY: Well, let’s go and get the rest of the supplies.

Both leaders exit stage left.

SARAH: Hey it’s a wand!  I wonder if it’s magic.

Sarah picks up the wand and waves it around finally pointing it at Lateefa who suddenly disappears.
 
SARAH: Whoops.

ELLA: (Freaking) What did you do?! We are going to get in so much trouble!! How are we going to tell her parents?

SARAH: Just hang on.  Let me try it again! (waves wand hitting Ella in the head by accident)

ELLA: Ouch!

SARAH: Sorry!! (Wave wand around more carefully)

Lateefa reappears as a pig

ELLA: (Still freaking and holding her nose) Oh my goodness!  Do you actually think her parents are going to want to feed THAT!?

Sarah whacks Lateefa on the nose with the wand. Lateefa disappears then reappears as normal.

Ann and Judy enter stage left

ANN: (Carrying supplies) We have five minutes to set up.

Sarah puts the wand in her back pack so that it is slightly showing out the top.
Everyone starts setting up camp.

JUDY: We’ll go get water.  You girls finish setting up.
 
Both leaders exit stage left.

Two little bunnies peak out of trees Centre stage and whisper to each other.

BUNNY 1: I see the wand.  It’s in that little girl’s backpack.  We have to get it.

The bunnies hop to Sarah’s backpack.

LATEEFA: Awww.  Look at those cute bunnies.

BUNNY 2: We are NOT cute!

BUNNY 1: I thought I was cute.  (To the audience) Don’t you think I’m cute? (After audience response) There you go.

BUNNY 2: (To the girls) Hand over the wand!

LATEEFA: What wand?

BUNNY 1: The Fairy Queen’s wand.

ELLA: What Fairy Queen?

SARAH: There is no such thing as…

ELLA: Don’t you even!

LATEEFA: Yeah! Fairies are soooo cute.

BUNNY 2: They are not cute!

BUNNY 1: I always thought fairies were cute. (To the audience) Don’t you think fairies are cute? (Waits for audience response)  There you go.

BUNNY 2: (getting frustrated) Listen! Hand over the wand now!  We are wasting time!

LATEEFA: What do you mean?

BUNNY 1: The Rock and Roll Troll King stole the Fairy Queen and the only way to set her free is to take her the wand.
 
SARAH: Where did he take her?

BUNNY 2: To the land of the Rock and Roll Trolls.

SARAH:  Okay, why did he take her?

BUNNY 1 and 2: Shrug

BUNNY 1: I think he’s just mean.  He sure looks mean anyway.

ELLA: Sarah, give them back the wand.

SARAH: Okay. (Gets the wand out of her backpack and tries to hand it to Bunny 1)

BUNNY 1: I have no hands.

ELLA: Right, sorry.

BUNNY 2: Put it in your mouth.

BUNNY 1: (Freaking) Are you crazy?! I could be turned into an elephant!

ELLA: Or a pig.

LATEEFA: Really?  Wow, that would be bad.

SARAH: No kidding.

LATEEFA: We could carry it for you.

ELLA and SARAH: Yeah, we could help.

BUNNY 1: Okay!  That would be great.  There will be lots of danger though.
 
SARAH: No problem. (She puts the wand back into her back pack and puts on the pack).

BUNNY 2: You will have to go through the Mudds of Stench, over the crocodile river, and get past Bob.

ALL GUIDES: Bob?

BUNNY 1: Bob is the name of one head of a two headed monster.

ELLA: What is the name of his other head?

BUNNY 2: You don’t want to know.

SARAH: Great.

BUNNY 1: Are you ready to journey to the land of the Rock and Roll Trolls?

ALL GUIDES: Yes!

BUNNY 1: Then follow us.

All exit Stage Right

 

ROCK N' ROLL TROLLS
SCENE THREE

 

The Mudds Of Stench

The girls and bunnies enter as if falling from the sky.

ALL: AHHHH!

BUNNY 1: Sorry.  The only way we know how to get into fairy land is through the magical rabbit holes.

BUNNY 2: Here we are!

The girls all hold their noses from the stench.

SARAH: Where are we?

ELLA: And when can we leave?

LATEEFA:  It smells soooo bad here.

BUNNY 1: Welcome to the Mudds of Stench.  We will have to get across it if we are going to get to the Land of the Rock and Roll Trolls.

LATEEFA: (starting towards centre stage). Okay, let’s go then.

BUNNY 1 and 2: NO WAIT!!!

LATEEFA:  (stopping).  What?

BUNNY 1:  If you walk in the Mudds of Stench you will turn into a Mudd Monster.

BUNNY 2: (waving her hand in front of her nose). A stinky Mudd Monster.

SARAH: So how do we cross?

BUNNY 1: You need a ticket?

ALL GUIDES: A ticket?

The Mudd Monster appears with a ticket machine.

MUDD MONSTER: Tickets please.  Tickets please.

ELLA: We don’t have any tickets.  How much are they?

SARAH:  (Whispering).   Ella I don’t have any money.  Do you?

ELLA:  No. Lateefa?

LATEEFA:  No. Me either.

SARAH:  Great. We’ll have to use our heads then.

LATEEFA:  (freaking) I’m not paying with my head!

ELLA: (laughing) No, no.  She means we’ll have to be smart.

LATEEFA: Oh, I can do that.

SARAH: (to the mudd monster) How much are your tickets?

MUDD MONSTER: Fourteen Rubies, twenty bars of soap, four hundred dollars or…

ELLA: or what?

MUDD MONSTER: Or you can answer my riddle.  But…

SARAH: but what?

MUDD MONSTER: If you get it wrong you will become a Mudd Monster like me.

LATEEFA: Can we go home now?

BUNNY 1 and 2: But you promised to help us.

SARAH: We aren’t going home.  We can do this.

ELLA: Are you sure.

SARAH:  We are Girl Guides. We are smart!

LATEEFA: And strong!

ELLA: And brave!

SARAH: (To audience) Do you think we should do it?  (Waits for response then to the mudd monster) Go ahead.  We’ll take your riddle. 
 
MUDD MONSTER: What is a boomerang that doesn’t come back?

LATEEFA:  Oooh. That’s a tough one.

ELLA: I don’t want to be a Mudd Monster!

SARAH: Stay calm.  We can figure this out.

LATEEFA: A boomerang that doesn’t come back wouldn’t be very useful.

ELLA: Boomerangs are made out of wood.

SARAH: (To audience) Do you guys know?  What is made out of wood and doesn’t come back when you throw it?

ALL GUIDES:  A stick!

MUDD MONSTER: You are correct!  Here are your tickets.  You may now safely cross the Mudds of Stench.

LATEEFA:  Thank goodness.  The smell is starting to make me dizzy.

All cross the stage and exit

 

ROCK N' ROLL TROLLS

SCENE FOUR

Crocodile River

CROC 1: I’m hungry.

CROC 1: I want a snack.

CROC 3: I hear some one coming.
 
Enter Guides and Bunnies.

BUNNY 1: We have to cross the crocodile river.

BUNNY 2: Without getting eaten.

LATEEFA: Boy these Rock and Roll Trolls sure aren’t easy to find. 

ELLA: No kidding.

CROC 1: Come closer.

CROC 2: You look juicy.

CROC 3: And sooo tasty.

SARAH: What was that?

BUNNY 1: The crocodiles.

BUNNY 2: Of course.

SARAH: Of course. 

CROC 1: We love little girls.

CROC 2: For breakfast.

CROC 3: Or lunch.

LATEEFA: Can we go home now?

BUNNY 1 and 2: But you promised to help us.

SARAH: We aren’t going home.  We can do this.

ELLA: Are you sure.

SARAH:  We are Girl Guides. We are smart!

LATEEFA: And strong!

ELLA: And brave!

SARAH: (To audience) Do you think we should do it?  (Waits for response). Okay, let’s make a plan.

LATEEFA: And use our heads.

ELLA: Exactly.

SARAH: (to the audience) What part of the crocodile do we have to watch out for?

ALL GUIDES: The teeth!

ELLA: So all we have to do is go where their teeth can’t get us.

LATEEFA: Do crocodiles have teeth on their backs.

SARAH: No.  No they don’t.  You’re brilliant Lateefa.

LATEEFA: I am?

ELLA:  Sure. We will just walk across the crocodile’s backs.

LATEEFA: (frightened) We will?

SARAH:  We will.

ELLA: Together.

BUNNY 1 and 2:  Very quickly.

LATEEFA: and carefully.

CROC 1: Come closer.

CROC 2: and closer.

CROC 3: and even closer.

SARAH:  Run across their backs, NOW!

All run across the crocodiles backs and off the other side of the stage.

 

ROCK N' ROLL TROLLS

SCENE FIVE

 

A forest clearing.  Home of Bob the two headed monster.

The Guides and Bunnies enter running.

SARAH: We did it!

ELLA: I can’t believe I just ran across three crocodiles!

LATEEFA: We are so brave!

BUNNY 1: You girls are amazing.

SARAH: Well, we are Girl Guides.

BUNNY 2:  Don’t get too happy.  We still have to get past Bob.

ALL GUIDES: Bob?

BUNNY 2: Bob the two headed monster.

ELLA: Oh yeah.

LATEEFA: No problem.

Enter Bob.

SARAH: (Seeing Bob) Oh great.

BOB HEAD 1: I am Bob.

BOB HEAD 2: And I am Toshi-tanjiro-morio-kyoko, Second head of Bob the monster, Guardian of the forest path, and monster of the iron neck.

BUNNY 2: I told you that you didn’t want to know the other name.

ELLA: No kidding.

BOB HEAD 2: You shall go no further!

BOB HEAD 1: The only way to pass us is to beat us in a fight.

BOB HEAD 2: And no one can do that!

BOB HEAD 1: So you may as well turn around and give up.

BOB HEAD 2: The last person to try to beat us went home crying to his mommy.

BOB HEAD 1: After we ate his shoes.

LATEEFA: Can we go home now?

BUNNY 1 and 2: But you promised to help us.

SARAH: We aren’t going home.  We can do this.

ELLA: Are you sure.

SARAH:  We are Girl Guides. We are smart!

LATEEFA: And strong!

ELLA: And brave!

SARAH: (To audience) Do you think we should do it?  (Waits for response). Think girls.

LATEEFA: Did anyone bring any weapons?

ELLA: I don’t think our Guide Leaders allow weapons at camp.

SARAH: Come on we have to think of something.

ELLA: (To the bunnies) Does Bob have any weaknesses?

BUNNY 1: Any what?

ELLA: Is there anything that they don’t like?

BUNNY 2: Well they are ticklish.

SARAH: Great.  A ticklish monster named Bob. Can this day get any weirder?

LATEEFA: Hey Sarah do you have anything in your back pack that we could use to tickle Bob and Toshi-tanji-whatzizname.

SARAH: Well let’s see. (Opens her back pack and takes out things as she names them) I have a water bottle, a first-aid kit, a flashlight, and some feathers I found during our hike yesterday.

ELLA: (to the audience) What do you think we should use to tickle Bob? (Wait for response)

ALL GUIDES: The feathers!

LATEEFA: Get your weapons girls!

ELLA: Out of our way Bob and uh… uh… other Bob head.

SARAH: One, two, three.  TICKLE!

All Guides tickle Bob while the bunnies cheer them on.
 
BOB HEAD 1: (Laughing) Stop.  Please stop.

BOB HEAD 2: (Laughing) You can pass.  You can pass.  Just please stop.

SARAH: Okay girls.  I think we can stop.

BOB HEAD 1: (Sulking) You shouldn’t be so mean.

BOB HEAD 2: (Sulking) Yeah that was a really dirty trick.
 
Bob exits.

BUNNY 1: We have almost reached the Fairy Queen!

BUNNY 2: And the Land of the Rock and Roll Trolls.
 
SARAH: Great.

All exit.

 

ROCK N' ROLL TROLLS

SCENE SIX

 

The land of the Rock and Roll Trolls.  A place spray painted with graffiti.

King Rotten, Doom and Crash stand around playing instruments.  The Fairy Queen is in a cage on the opposite corner of the stage - opposite to the side the girls will enter. The trolls sing their troll song.

TROLLS: We are the Rock and Roll Trolls
And this is what we do
We thump and bump around
And swim about in goo
Goo Goo Goo Goo
 
Because we have no manners
And we don’t really care
We are the Rock and Roll Trolls
And we have rockin’ green hair!
Hair Hair Hair Hair.

KING ROTTEN: Hey Fairy Queen.  You could join us you know.  It wouldn’t be so bad.

CRASH: Yeah, you shouldn’t be so stubborn.

DOOM: Fairies!  They are so uncooperative.

FAIRY QUEEN: Let me go you hideous looking beasts!

KING ROTTEN: Not fair judging a book by its cover.  We can be very nice ya know.

CRASH: when we want to be.

FAIRY QUEEN: Why did you capture me anyway?

KING ROTTEN: To help with the party of course.

DOOM: Are you guys ready for the big party?

KING ROTTEN: Well the music is not too bad. It’s the dancing I’m worried about.

CRASH:  Has any one seen Lux?

DOOM: Lux is getting the drums ready.  He said the party was going to be loud.
 
KING ROTTEN: Well Lux knows how to make any party he comes to loud.  That’s for sure.

CRASH: Hey here he comes now.  And he has company.

Lux enters leading the Guides and the Bunnies.

LUX:  I found some trespassers in our forest.

CRASH: Oooh, what are they?

LUX:  A couple of bunnies and… what did you say you were again?

SARAH: Girl Guides.

LUX: Oh yeah.  Girl Guides.

DOOM: I’ve heard of them in books but I’ve never actually seen one.  Starts poking at them.
 
ELLA: Stop that!

DOOM: Why, are you scared?

ELLA: No.  It’s just really irritating.

DOOM: Oh, sorry.

FAIRY QUEEN: Let them go you badly dressed freaks.

KING ROTTEN: There you go with the name calling again.  We have feelings too you know.

LATEEFA:  I hate to admit it.  But he’s right.  You shouldn’t call anyone names, even if they are a troll.

KING ROTTEN: A Rock And Roll troll actually.  King Rotten at your service. (he bows)

DOOM: I’m Doom.

CRASH: I’m Crash and you have already met Lux.

LATEEFA: I’m Lateefa, pleased to meet you.

BUNNY 2: How can you be pleased to meet them?!  They are mean, ugly, hideous, stupid, yucky trolls!

BUNNY 1: And they kidnapped the Fairy Queen!

KING ROTTEN: (sighing)  I do wish you would stop calling us names.  It is really a mean thing to do.

BUNNY 2: You are the mean ones!

KING ROTTEN: No, you are!

BUNNY 1 and 2: You!

ALL TROLLS: No you!

BUNNY 1 and 2: You!

ALL TROLLS: No you!

BUNNY 1 and 2: You!

ALL TROLLS: No you!

SARAH: Stop it!  Just stop it!

ELLA: Did you steal the Fairy Queen?

KING ROTTEN: Yes I did.

LATEEFA: That was a very awful thing to do.

KING ROTTEN: I had to.

ALL OTHER TROLLS: make noises of agreement.

SARAH: Why did you have to?

KING ROTTEN: It was the only way.

SARAH: The only way to what?

KING ROTTEN: (shy) To get her to teach us how to dance.  That’s all we really wanted.  We are having a party you see, and I didn’t want to look like a fool by not knowing how to dance.

LUX: We all need a little help.

LATEEFA: You should have asked for help then!

ELLA: Not just taken the Fairy Queen.

SARAH: Yeah, that’s not how you treat people.  It’s just not nice.

KING ROTTEN:  Sorry about that.  We are trolls and Rock and Roll Trolls at that. 

DOOM: So how do you treat people?

CRASH: How do you ask for help?

LUX: What word do you use?

SARAH: (To the audience) You know your manners.  Let’s tell these Rock and Roll Trolls that the word to use when they need to ask for help is please.  Shout it out when I count to three.  One, two, three.  PLEASE!

KING ROTTEN: That’s all we had to say?  Please?  And someone would help us?
 
LATEEFA: And you can’t lock them in a cage.  It’s just bad manners.

KING ROTTEN: Oh, sorry.  Goes over to the cage and lets out the Fairy Queen. Here you go.  I am awfully sorry about the mix up.  We will definitely work on our manners. Right boys?

ALL TROLLS: Make agreement noises

KING ROTTEN: So what do you say Fairy Queen will you please teach us how to dance for the party?

FAIRY QUEEN: No!

BUNNY 2: No way!

BUNNY 1: I don’t think it would be a very good idea.

SARAH: But why?

ELLA: He did ask nicely.

LATEEFA: And he said sorry.

FAIRY QUEEN: Well, just look at them.  They don’t look like anyone I know.  They are all rough and coloured and painted.  They look different than me.

LUX: We can’t help it.

DOOM: It’s just the way we are.

CRASH: Yeah, we were born this way.

KING ROTTEN: I’m sorry we don’t look like you.  All Rock and Roll Trolls look like we do.  But just because we look different than you doesn’t mean that we are different than you on the inside.

ELLA: Sure.  With a few lessons in manners.  I think all of you could be very good friends.

FAIRY QUEEN: Really?

KING ROTTEN: Really?

LATEEFA: Sure.  Give it a try.  It’s so much fun to make new friends.  (To the audience) Don’t you think?

BUNNY 1: Well I’ll try to be their friend.

BUNNY 2: I could try too.

SARAH: Good for you.

LUX: Could you teach us how to dance?

BUNNY 1: Just hip hop.

FAIRY QUEEN: I will teach them how to dance.  I can see now that you should try to get to know someone before you decide if you like them or not.

KING ROTTEN: Thank you so much.  We promise never to lock you up again.

FAIRY QUEEN: Shall I teach everyone how to dance?

ALL GUIDES:  That would be great!

SARAH: (To the audience) Stand up and we can all learn.

Fairy Queen teaches a simple dance to the audience and the people on stage.

KING ROTTEN: Now we will teach everyone how to Rock and Roll!  Lux!

LUX:  (To audience) If you stand very still and quiet, I will hand out some instruments to all of you.   (With the help of the bunnies and Guides shakers are handed out to the audience) Now copy my rhythm. Lux uses his drum sticks to beat out a simple rhythm that the audience is to copy using their shakers. Good job.

KING ROTTEN: Now all together let’s use our dance moves and our instruments and have a party.

ALL: cheer.

The Rock and Roll trolls play their music and sing their song while everyone else dances.

TROLLS and EVERYONE ELSE ON THE STAGE:

We are the Rock and Roll Trolls
And this is what we do
We thump and bump around
And swim about in goo
Goo Goo Goo Goo
 
Because we have now have manners
And we really, really care
We are the Rock and Roll Trolls
And we still have rockin’ green hair!
Hair Hair Hair Hair

At the end of the song everyone cheers again.

SARAH: That was so much fun.  Oh and by the way Fairy Queen, here is your wand.

ELLA: I was just thinking.  I wonder if our Guide Leaders are missing us.

LATEEFA: Oh no!  They must be so worried.

FAIRY QUEEN: That is no problem girls.  With my wand I can send you back to your campsite and your leaders with be none the wiser.

SARAH: Oh thank you. 

ELLA: It’s been so nice meeting you all.

LATEEFA: I’m going to miss you.  It was a wonderful party.

The Fairy Queen waves her magic wand and the girls disappear.

 

 

ROCK N' ROLL TROLLS

SCENE SEVEN

 

The campsite in the forest clearing.

Enter the Guides.

SARAH: What an adventure.

ELLA: We were brave, and strong and…

LATEEFA: We used our heads.

SARAH: Those trolls were so much fun.

ELLA: As soon as they started using their manners that is.

LATEEFA: I think the others learned something too.

SARAH:  What? That you shouldn’t judge someone by how they look?

LATEEFA: No.  That Rock and Roll is so much fun!

Enter the Guide Leaders carrying the water jugs

JUDY: Haven’t you girls finished setting up camp yet?

ANNE: They were probably too busy talking about boys to do it.

JUDY: Well don’t worry.  We’ll help you out.  This camp is going to be so fun.

SARAH:  It already has been.

ELLA AND LATEEFA: No kidding.

ANNE: What was that girls?

ALL GUIDES: Oh nothing.
 
All start setting up camp.

THE END